A Little Explanation

Well, it appears some explanation may be in order. In another post ... where I was to give seven weird or random facts about myself ... I noted that one of my first memories was falling off of a tricycle drunk. I have had so many emails over that and even Satchel wanted to know if that was for real. :)

So ... yes, that is real. It is one of my first memories. I don't remember drinking, but I remember falling off the tricycle drunk and my mom getting really mad at my daddy for it. I also remember her putting me in bed and me watching the ceiling spin and being ever so sick.

My daddy was an alcoholic. He started drinking young ... in his teens. His father was an alcoholic as well. So were a few of my uncles. So was my daddy's uncle. My daddy wasn't a bad man. He wasn't being mean or malicious when he gave me beer. In his mind ... he thought that if he let me have it then I wouldn't end up like him and want it. It also wasn't like he just gave me a whole beer. He would give me drinks of his and later on I remember him giving me little ponies.

Of course, in the 70's ... we didn't know what we know now about alcohol. My daddy had no idea that what he was doing could end up affecting me in ways none of us ever imagined. He just didn't want me to end up being an alcoholic like him and he thought this was one of the best ways to ensure that.

Also, in the 70's and 80's ... it wasn't all that uncommon. I was drinking as a teenager with adult supervision. Long after my dad had stopped giving me beer ... my "godparents" allowed me to drink at their house. They were also alcoholics. In their minds ... if I was drinking there then I wasn't drinking somewhere else and I was safe there. No one ... and I mean no one ... realized that all they were doing was contributing to me becoming an alcoholic at a young age.

I was a drunk ... and I mean a drunk ... by the time I was nineteen. I was always in the bootleggers. I had credit at the bootleggers! Do you know how hard it is to get credit at a bootleggers? Almost impossible! But, they knew I would be back and I would have their money. I was drunk by noon most days and would hide liquor all over the house.

Now, don't get me wrong ... I am not glorifying this at all. It was just the way it was. And, I hold no hard feelings towards my daddy or anyone else who contributed to my alcoholism or enabled me to drink. It was my coping device for years and some years were better than others. And, it is also a battle I fought and with God's grace ... I won. The Lord enabled me to get past it and I don't drink at all anymore.

I pray it stops with me as well. I have been very honest with my children about my childhood and the life I led and how far different it is from theirs. They know they come from a long line of alcoholics and how easy it would be for them to fall into that line and end up struggling with something they could easily avoid. All they have to do is "say no" ... and they have a long list of reasons to do so.